Growing up in a family with an alcoholic member is already a huge thing that one has to face. But, there is more to that. Issues also stem from it. For one, adult children of alcoholics have to deal with the many effects of having an alcoholic family member. It is with the situation that children develop characteristics. These are characteristics like developing the fear of expressing one’s self and dealing with powerful emotions and feelings. There is also the feat of intimacy or the difficulty in dealing with it. Although how an adult children deal with it is in a case to case scenario, fear of intimacy is always there.
Developing this characteristic is already a huge issue that needs to be settled. However, for that to happen, it would need the entire focus of the person. The thing is, how do they work on it when it comes to how adult children of alcoholics deal with intimacy? There are two responses to this. It is either they never learn how to deal with it or they seek out this particular thing.
But, when it comes to the fear itself, it is something that the person has to do on their own to resolve it. Fear of intimacy is linked to their low self-esteem and the trust issues they have. Because of these things, adult children of alcoholics find it hard to have a close relationship. Thus, it ends up with so many possible ways of how adult children of alcoholics deal with intimacy. Among these ways include:
They are Never Able to Build a Close Relationship. This goes on all types of relationships. Oftentimes, in a family with an alcoholic member, the relationship does not come out good in front of the children. In such case, it can be that either of the parents that is an alcoholic. Everyone knows how the scenes progresses as one of the parents get drunk. These scenarios often affect the relationship. In the eyes of a child, it is one they would not want to have in the future. Because of the fear of having the same kind of relationship as the child’s parent, fear of intimacy develops.
Never Had or Experienced a Normal Relationship. Seeing how one’s parents get drunk and the aftermath of that, children tend to be idealistic. One may not be afraid of the intimacy. But, to prevent them from ending up with the same person who is always drinking, they build the ideal people they want to be with. As the ideal characteristics get instilled in one’s mind, it leads to the person they seek. When on relationship, it will not be avoided for them to see flaws in the person they are with and seek more.
They Prefer that it is Better to Be Alone Than to Have a Close Relationship. It is a possible scenario, especially if the children are traumatized of what they had experienced as a child with an alcoholic parent.
How adult children of alcoholics deal with intimacy comes in many ways. These are just some of the ways how these children deal with it.