49 Greatest Bill Watterson Quotes

49 Greatest Bill Watterson Quotes

by / Comments Off / 162 View / Jan 7, 2015

Bill Watterson is a world famous cartoonist who is most known for creating the infamous Calvin and Hobbes comic strips. He published the comic in 1985 and stopped in 1995 after stating that he had done all he could with the characters. He is currently still alive and living in Washington, D.C. with his wife.

“A day can really slip by when you’re deliberately avoiding what you’re supposed to do.”

“A real job is a job you hate.”

“As far as I’m concerned, if something is so complicated that you can’t explain it in 10 seconds, then it’s probably not worth knowing anyway.”

“Calvin: Life’s a lot more fun when you aren’t responsible for your actions.”

“Did you ever wonder if the person in the puddle is real, and you’re just a reflection of him?”

“Getting an inch of snow is like winning 10 cents in the lottery.”

“Girls are like slugs—they probably serve some purpose, but it’s hard to imagine what.”

“God put me on earth to accomplish certain things. Right now, I’m so far behind, I’ll never die.”

“Happiness is being famous for your financial ability to indulge in every kind of excess.”

“Heck, what’s a little extortion among friends?”

“Hello Dad! It is now three in the morning. Do you know where I am?”

“I hate to think that all my current experiences will someday become stories with no point.”

“I like maxims that don’t encourage behavior modification.”

“I liked things better when I didn’t understand them.”

“I think hiccup cures were really invented for the amusement of the patient’s friends.”

“I think we dream so we don’t have to be apart so long. If we’re in each other’s dreams, we can play together all night.”

“If I had rolled along with the strip’s popularity and repeated myself for another five, 10 or 20 years, the people now ‘grieving’ for ‘Calvin and Hobbes’ would be wishing me dead.”

“I’m a misunderstood genius.”

“I’m killing time while I wait for life to shower me with meaning and happiness.”

“I’m not dumb. I just have a command of thoroughly useless information.”

“Isn’t it sad how some people’s grip on their lives is so precarious that they’ll embrace any preposterous delusion rather than face an occasional bleak truth?”

“It seems like once people grow up, they have no idea what’s cool.”

“It’s always better to leave the party early.”

“It’s not denial. I’m just selective about the reality I accept.”

“Know what’s weird? Day by day, nothing seems to change. But pretty soon, everything’s different.”

“Letting your mind play is the best way to solve problems.”

“Life is like topography, Hobbes. There are summits of happiness and success, flat stretches of boring routine and valleys of frustration and failure.”

“Life’s disappointments are harder to take when you don’t know any swear words.”

“Look! A trickle of water running through some dirt! I’d say our afternoon just got booked solid!”

“Reading goes faster if you don’t sweat comprehension.”

“Reality continues to ruin my life.”

“Sometimes I think the surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that none of it has tried to contact us.”

“Sometimes when I’m talking, my words can’t keep up with my thoughts. I wonder why we think faster than we speak. Probably so we can think twice.”

“Specifically, I’d like to debate whether cannibalism ought to be grounds for leniency in murders, since it’s less wasteful.”

“Talking with you is sort of the conversational equivalent of an out of body experience.”

“That’s the difference between me and the rest of the world! Happiness isn’t good enough for me! I demand euphoria!”

“That’s the whole problem with science. You’ve got a bunch of empiricists trying to describe things of unimaginable wonder.”

“The problem with the future is that it keeps turning into the present.”

“The surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that it has never tried to contact us.”

“There is not enough time to do all the nothing we want to do.”

“Things are never quite as scary when you’ve got a best friend.”

“Uh oh… here comes Calvin – the Incurable Weirdness poster child.”

“We all have different desires and needs, but if we don’t discover what we want from ourselves and what we stand for, we will live passively and unfulfilled.”

“Weekends don’t count unless you spend them doing something completely pointless.”

“What fun is it being cool if you can’t wear a sombrero?”

“When life gives you lemons, chunk it right back.”

“Why waste time learning when ignorance is instantaneous.”

“You can’t just turn on creativity like a faucet. You have to be in the right mood.”

“You know, sometimes kids get bad grades in school because the class moves too slow for them. Einstein got D’s in school. Well guess what, I get F’s!”