27 Great Mindy Kaling Quotes

27 Great Mindy Kaling Quotes

by / Comments Off / 52 View / Dec 23, 2014

Mindy Kaling, born Vera Mindy Chokalingam, is an actress, comedian, and producer who is most known for her roles in popular shows such as The Office and The Mindy Project. She has also worked on feature films such as Wreck It Ralph and The Five Year Engagement. She lives in Massachusetts and continues to pursue her performance career.

“A remarkable thing about me is that the time that elapses between a sad thought and a flood of tears is three or four seconds.”

“Always Wear Flats and Have Your Friends Sleep Over: A Step-by-Step How-To Guide for Avoiding Getting Murdered.”

“As my mom has said, when one person is unhappy, it usually means two people are unhappy but that one has not come to terms with it yet.”

“Even in my revenge fantasy where all I do is exercise, I can still do only twenty-five pull-ups. Pull-ups are tough, no joke.”

“Everyone has a moment when they discover they love Amy Poehler.”

“Future hipsters will love me ironically.”

“I just want ambitious teenagers to know it is totally fine to be quite, observant kids. Besides being a delight to your parents, you will find you have plenty of time later to catch up.”

“I really think guys only need two pairs of shoes. A nice pair of black shoes and a pair of Chuck Taylors.”

“I say if you love something, set it in a small cage and pester and smother it with love until it either loves you back or dies.”

“I think when men hear that women want a commitment, they think it means commitment to a romantic relationship, but that’s not it. It’s a commitment to not floating around anywhere. I want a
guy who is entrenched in his own life.”

“If I gave my mother a knitted scarf she’d be worried I was wasting my time doing stupid stuff like knitting instead of school work. Presenting a homemade knitted object to my parents was
actually like handing them a detailed backlog of my idleness.”

“If I’m going to be a mess, I might as well be a hot mess, right?”

“If it weren’t for my imagination, I would weigh ten thousand pounds. This is because the only way I am able to exercise anymore is through a long and vivid revenge fantasy.”

“I’m not overweight. I flucuate between chubby and curvy.”

“I’m too excited to sleep!”

“In my mind, the sexiest thing in the world is the feeling that you’re wanted.”

“In psychology (okay, Twilight) they teach you about the notion of imprinting, and I think it applies here. I reverse-imprinted with athleticism. Ours is the great non-love story of my life.”

“Later, when you’re grown up, you realize you never really get to hang out with your family. You pretty much have only eighteen years to spend with them full time, and that’s it.”

“One friend with whom you have a lot in common is better than three with whom you struggle to find things to talk about.”

“So I’m into men now, even though they can be frightening. I want a schedule-keeping, waking-up-early, wallet-carrying, non-Velcro-shoe-wearing man.”

“Sometimes you just have to put on lip gloss and pretend to be psyched.”

“That’s the one nice thing about being a dork about men: you can sometimes play it off as restrained and classy.”

“There are many teenage vampire books you could have purchased instead. I’m grateful you made this choice.”

“There Has Ceased to Be a Difference Between My Awake Clothes and My Asleep Clothes.”

“There is no sunrise so beautiful that it is worth waking me up to see it.”

“We never needed best friend gear because I guess with real friends you don’t have to make it official. It just is.”

“You should know I disagree with a lot of traditional advice. For instance, they say the best revenge is living well. I say it’s acid in the face—who will love them now?”